Kate Motaung, Rockwall Christian Counseling

About Kate Motaung

Kate Motaung is the Senior Writer, Editor, and Content Manager for a multi-state company. She is the author of several books including Letters to Grief, 101 Prayers for Comfort in Difficult Times, and A Place to Land: A Story of Longing and Belonging. Kate is also the host of Five Minute Friday, an online writing community that equips and encourages Christian writers, and the owner of Refine Services, a company that offers editing services. She and her South African husband have three young adult children and currently live in West Michigan. Find Kate’s books at katemotaung.com/books.

Common Symptoms of Stress and Anxiety

Common Symptoms of Stress and Anxiety

Dr. Barbara Orticelli, Kate Motaung2025-05-15T07:43:30+00:00May 15th, 2025|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

It seems like more people are experiencing symptoms of stress and anxiety. In fact, according to the National Institute of Mental Health, as many as 31% of the United States adult population will experience an anxiety disorder during their lifetime; that is, millions of Americans struggling with the symptoms of stress and anxiety. The Harmful Effects of Chronic Stress and Anxiety The harmful effects of the symptoms of stress and anxiety can lead to a physical and mental decline in health. When you feel overwhelmed, your body releases cortisol and adrenaline to help you through the “danger.” However, chronic stress can keep your body suspended in this fight-or-flight response. Symptoms of Stress and Anxiety You may not experience all of the symptoms of stress and anxiety for them to affect your health. For example, increased blood pressure and resting heart rate over a long period will increase your risk of heart disease, heart attack, and stroke. Consult your doctor to rule out any medical conditions and seek counseling to help you manage your symptoms. Digestive Issues Increased cortisol and adrenaline can trigger the fight-or-flight response, increasing stomach acid. When stressed, you may experience acid reflux, heartburn, excessive burning, and stomach pain. Consult with your physician about medical treatments to soothe your digestive tract as you work on stress management. Headaches Stress or tension headaches can feel like a vice around your head. You may feel this headache on both sides of the head. If you are a woman, you may also experience more severe headaches on the days leading up to your menstrual period. Over-the-counter medications can help as well as getting plenty of sleep. Increased Heart Rate Adrenaline gets your heart pumping, preparing you to run or fight. Chronic stress and anxiety can cause your resting heart rate [...]

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Types of Behavioral Therapy for Children

Types of Behavioral Therapy for Children

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-05-09T06:54:02+00:00May 9th, 2025|Christian Counseling for Children, Family Counseling, Featured|

Behavioral therapy for children is a treatment that focuses on a child’s actions rather than on their emotions. It is based on the premise that behaviors are learned, and so they can also be changed. Techniques may vary according to the disorder being treated, but the primary emphasis is on promoting desirable behaviors while reducing or eliminating unwanted ones. Primary caregivers and teachers are usually involved in the process as well. Generally, the earlier the intervention, the more successful the outcome will be. Untreated children with behavioral disorders are likely to grow up to be dysfunctional adults. Signs Your Child May Need Behavioral Therapy Regular irritability Defiant behaviors Loss of interest in activities they enjoyed Intense emotional reactions Easily set off by minor triggers Temper tantrums Difficulty handling frustration Sudden change in mood or behavior Failure to act their age Head banging, hair pulling, or skin picking Repeated biting, hitting, or kicking Constant fighting Disrespect for authority figures Lying Frequent nightmares Anxiety that interferes with normal activities Stealing Significant changes in sleeping and eating habits Excessive worrying or sadness Types Of Behavioral Therapy for Children Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) Cognitive behavioral therapy is a combination of behavioral therapy, which focuses on patterns of action, and cognitive therapy, which focuses on thought patterns. Studies have shown it to be an effective form of treatment for many psychological disorders among children and adolescents such as depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), oppositional defiant disorder (ODD), and disruptive behavior. The counselor will help your child become aware of his or her thoughts and feelings, evaluate if they are rational or distorted, and learn how to replace them with more positive ones. By discovering new ways of looking at things, the child learns how to respond differently. Techniques [...]

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Understanding and Working Through a Sexless Marriage

Understanding and Working Through a Sexless Marriage

Logan Ashford, Kate Motaung2025-05-06T07:14:03+00:00May 6th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

A marriage is a little bit like a tree. A tree takes root in soil of varying quality, and it gets exposed to the elements like sun, wind, and rain. Sometimes the tree gets too much sun, or it gets battered by fierce winds, it gets too much water in a flash flood, or too little of it during a drought. In the same way, the tree can get just the right amount of what it needs so that it flourishes. The story of a tree can be seen when you check the rings in its trunk. A marriage brings two people together, typically in happy circumstances, and the two want to spend their lives together making each other happy. The couple goes through any number of circumstances, like grief and loss of loved ones or cherished dreams, financial woes, health issues, disagreements, joyous celebrations, new beginnings, accomplishing goals like paying off the mortgage or traveling, etc. Some marriages come to the point where sexual intimacy has all but evaporated, and that in itself poses several challenges for the couple. How does a marriage become sexless, and is there a way to turn things around? The good news is that there are ways for a couple to flourish and strengthen their relationship, deepening their intimacy and sense of connection. What is a sexless marriage? It’s more than likely that when two people meet and decide to get married, they feel passion for each other. Often, the couple can’t keep their hands off each other, which can be problematic since they need to wait until after their nuptials to consummate the relationship. In ways that will be described shortly, a relationship can remain intact but with the sense of intimacy and connection lost. There are different ways to understand what [...]

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Overcoming Resentment in Family Relationships

Overcoming Resentment in Family Relationships

Ronald Jenkins, Kate Motaung2025-04-29T07:03:15+00:00April 29th, 2025|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Every family story does not read with the fairy tale ending of “they all lived happily ever after.” We can look at the Bible and see many relationships fractured by favoritism, strife, envy, and deception among those in the same bloodline. Though many millennia later, we see evidence of the same painful and traumatic experiences in the Bible populate our own timelines and family stories. Over time, living with these conditions can wear on a person’s soul and fray hope for something better or at least different. Unresolved pain, anger, and unforgiveness deposit themselves into the soil of our lives, turning the roots of our family tree bitter and bearing the fruit of resentment. Overcoming resentment is no easy feat. We cannot ignore infractions, errors, and missteps and expect to just get over what has happened that is part of our difficult family past or present. God does not expect us to place ourselves in a position where we remain objects of someone else’s evil intentions or actions. It grieves Him to see us endure forms of abuse, neglect, or harm, whether we are experiencing it for the first time or constantly reliving it through triggers or the hold that unforgiveness may have on our souls. Part of embracing His wisdom, love, and care is tending to our safety and our souls to heal from what would have otherwise destroyed us. Resentment in the Bible In Genesis, we gather a tale of two brothers. Cain resented Abel for his offering, though God commended the younger of Adam and Eve’s first two sons (Hebrews 11:4). God, in wisdom and love, counseled Cain, advising that his offering would be accepted if he would address the sin that crouched at his door. God knew that envy was waiting to devour Cain, but [...]

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Ways to Reduce Anxiety Surrounding Money

Ways to Reduce Anxiety Surrounding Money

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-04-29T06:36:59+00:00April 29th, 2025|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Money is often a taboo topic, yet financial strain can trigger chronic anxiety in people. People suffering from anxiety linked to money are often embarrassed to admit it. They feel that admitting to a counselor that they struggle to pay their bills and put food on the table somehow makes them less worthy of mental health help. So, the cycle continues. Let’s normalize speaking freely about money issues and how they affect mental health, starting with ways to reduce anxiety surrounding money. Dealing with Anxiety Surrounding Money Anxiety can make it difficult to sleep at night, and if you struggle to keep up with the expenses, then you are familiar with those sleepless nights. Knowing it could be a debt collector, you may be well acquainted with panic attacks, heart palpitations, and trembling when the phone rings. If you are looking for ways to reduce anxiety over money, you have come to the right place. The following list delves into actions you can take today to gain control of your finances. Feeling in control, setting goals, and making headway in your finances will create a sense of accomplishment. You will have more confidence in yourself and trigger the brain’s reward center, lowering your stress level. Make budgeting your friend The first step to learning ways to reduce anxiety about money is to become aware of your monthly income and expenses. The next step is to budget your income, so you know exactly what you have to work with monthly. Dave Ramsey, the financial radio show host, recommends using a zero-based budget. To start, you list your income for the month and then assign money to each of your expenses down to the dollar. Always start with the basics, such as tithing, savings, mortgage or rent, utility bills, groceries, and [...]

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Bible Verses for Mourning: Finding Comfort in Difficult Times

Bible Verses for Mourning: Finding Comfort in Difficult Times

Logan Ashford, Kate Motaung2025-04-24T12:20:24+00:00April 24th, 2025|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

There are moments and seasons in life when it matters more than anything to be seen and heard. The things we think, feel, know, and experience matter and that affirmation counts at certain times more than others. When you go through loss and bereavement, it can be utterly devastating. It can unmoor you from everything that you know, and it makes a difference to know at that moment that someone knows, sees, and cares. We all process loss differently. Some people want others around them, others want to be alone with their thoughts and reach out for connection when needed. Still others want that one loved one with whom they feel safe, and they can be vulnerable. Grief does strange things to us, and how we respond isn’t predictable. The main thing is to find ways to deal with the grief, and not to bury it. One place to turn to for help in processing grief is Scripture. It deals with grief, often in its raw and unvarnished form, and it can help us to process our own grief as we see how other godly people made sense of what feels senseless. Comfort from Scripture During Mourning Often, when a person loses a loved one, they are said to be “in mourning” or “in a period of mourning”. This can make it sound as though there is a defined or limited time to mourn your loved one. In truth, grief remains with you for the rest of your life, and it’s mainly about finding ways to cope with it and do life without your loved one. The mourning may take a different shape, but grief remains a part of your life. Whether it is the loss of a loved one, a cherished pet, or even the end of a [...]

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Breaking Up is Hard to Do: Navigating Romantic Relationships and Issues of the Heart

Breaking Up is Hard to Do: Navigating Romantic Relationships and Issues of the Heart

Lori Askew, Kate Motaung2025-04-24T11:57:39+00:00April 24th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Billions of people populate planet Earth. Naturally, it feels like we’ve discovered hidden treasure when meeting “the one” of a million potential romantic interests. It’s exciting to start a new romantic relationship and to learn about that person, while also discovering and developing ourselves. As the relationship progresses, we discover the beauty of connection, learning to give and receive love. Yet, as time evolves, the match we have made may look and feel different than we remember at the start. Often, what seemed magical in the beginning feels weighty in time. King Solomon, who penned many proverbs, echoed that God coordinates our purpose with the times and seasons of our lives. When relationships fray, we may question why an individual came into our lives. Growing a healthy relationship takes two people with God at the core, but everyone who comes together won’t necessarily remain together. Whether joining with a potential partner or separating from them, our hearts require tender care as we pray, seek counsel, and follow the Holy Spirit’s lead. Not only do we need to discern God’s heart before we enter a dating partnership, but we also need to search His heart before terminating a relationship. This article outfits us with spiritual insight and practical considerations for relationships when plagued with issues of the heart. Suitability and Breaking Up While some people may not have all of what we are looking for, that may not mean they are an unsuitable fit or a poor choice. Likewise, some people may possess desirable qualities, and not be suitable or well-matched for us. According to the Bible, God wants us to have partners that are a good fit. Genesis 2:18 says, “…It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” [...]

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Can a Christian Marriage Survive Infidelity?

Can a Christian Marriage Survive Infidelity?

Ronald Jenkins, Kate Motaung2025-04-15T06:54:28+00:00April 15th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Infidelity and Affairs, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

For many people, the discovery of infidelity marks the end of any happily ever after in their marriage. But Christians who are taught that marriage is for life and that divorce is wrong may find themselves in a difficult position when they discover that their partner has been unfaithful to them. Whichever path a person may choose, many challenges will lie ahead. It is important not to rush into big decisions without prayer and careful consideration of everything. What is infidelity? Infidelity is when one partner in a relationship is unfaithful to the other. Adultery is considered to be a serious breach of the marriage covenant and is seen as both a sin against the spouse and a sin against God. In the Bible, it is seen as a broader category than just the physical sexual act. It also includes an individual’s unfaithful desires and thoughts (Matthew 5:27-30). One of the challenges of talking about infidelity is that individual spouses and couples may have different understandings of infidelity. For instance, is it okay to watch pornography, or to reach out and connect with a former partner on social media? Some couples will have had these important conversations during premarital counseling or afterward to establish firm boundaries in their relationship. Infidelity can thus take the form of emotional or physical acts of infidelity that violate boundaries the couple has set for themselves. For a Christian couple, infidelity may include things that the couple may consider okay, but Scripture addresses and says otherwise. As such, from a Christian perspective, there is no such thing as an open marriage (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:3-6; Proverbs 5; 6:20-35; 1 Corinthians 6:12-20). What does the Bible say about infidelity? In the well-known Ten Commandments, the first laws given to the nation of Israel, we find [...]

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How to Use Prayers of Lament as Part of the Grieving Process

How to Use Prayers of Lament as Part of the Grieving Process

Kate Motaung2025-04-15T05:53:49+00:00April 15th, 2025|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

It can be both a delight and a relief to find an author or poet who expresses a thought or feeling in a way that feels as if it came straight out of you. It’s a delight because you’ve found just the right words to express something you have felt or thought. It’s also a relief because it confirms that you aren’t the only person who has felt this way before. You aren’t alone or on an outer fringe inaccessible to others. It is this way with lament. We have other thoughts and emotions, such as what we experience when we go through grief, loss, and sadness. Whether you are recently bereaved or have been dealing with the loss of a loved one for a while, there is comfort to be found in being able to fully express what you’re feeling and experiencing. Prayers of lament may be one way to do this, and they can be an effective part of the grieving process. Grieving as a Process When you lose someone, or you anticipate that you will lose someone, your whole being experiences that loss. You had a connection with that person, and that connection is lost and irrevocably changed. Even in situations where you felt estranged or even hostile toward the other person, you can still experience grief. Grief is a process and a rather convoluted one at that. It’s about coming to terms with your loss, and realigning your world so that you can carry on living with your loved one’s absence as part of the new reality. Grieving is about acknowledging the loss, allowing yourself to experience all the emotions and thoughts that come with that loss, and learning how to cope. Each person grieves in their own way. One reason grief is a convoluted [...]

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A Few Key Signs of Clinical Depression

A Few Key Signs of Clinical Depression

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-03-28T06:35:08+00:00March 28th, 2025|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Have you ever found yourself at odds with yourself? You may have told yourself to avoid engaging in certain behaviors, but despite yourself, you engage in the very behaviors you wanted to avoid. It can leave you feeling like you’ve betrayed yourself and can’t trust yourself. Being at odds with yourself in this way can be deeply unsettling, and it’s unfortunately one of the things that depression can do to a person. If a person has clinical depression, it can lead them to have thoughts that, while being untrue and unhelpful to one’s well-being, will nonetheless suggest themselves powerfully and ring as true. You can’t trust what your mind is telling you, especially when it causes you to endlessly rehearse negative thoughts. It helps to know the signs of clinical depression and to seek treatment for it. A Brief Breakdown of Clinical Depression Clinical depression is a mood disorder that affects how a person feels, thinks, and acts. A person’s ability to function in daily life is seriously hampered by depression because it can affect their cognitive ability and make them fatigued or lethargic. Clinical depression is also known as major depressive disorder, and it is a serious mental health condition marked by persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and loss of interest. Depression is a common condition that affects around 5% of the global population, and it can occur at any age. It affects people from all walks of life. Women are more likely to experience depression, though that figure could be inaccurate because men are also typically less willing to report that they’re experiencing depression and seek help for it. There are several different types of depression, including major depressive disorder, postpartum depression, persistent depressive disorder, seasonal affective disorder, and bipolar disorder. A challenge that someone with depression [...]

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Kate Motaung

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