Family Counseling Archives | Rockwall Christian Counseling

Preventing Generational Attachment Issues from Affecting Your Kids

Preventing Generational Attachment Issues from Affecting Your Kids

Ronald Jenkins, Kate Motaung2025-06-21T06:35:16+00:00June 23rd, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Sometimes, ingrained habits from our past can unknowingly affect how we parent and influence the emotional development of our children in ways we might not even realize. This is often the case with negative attachment issues, which are usually repeated patterns that quietly shape the emotional landscape of our families. Perhaps you’ve already noticed your child’s hesitation to connect with others, or maybe how they act out when they feel scared or uncertain. As a parent, you might even catch yourself repeating the same emotional patterns that you experienced growing up and wonder why you struggle to connect in certain ways with your child. If these things sound familiar, it might be a sign of generational attachment issues that can affect both you and your kids. Unresolved attachment issues are more than just a set of behaviors; they are deeply ingrained emotional patterns that begin in childhood. When these issues are ignored, they can have long-lasting effects, not only on us but on our children as well. The good news is that with awareness and intentional effort, these cycles can be broken. What are attachment issues, and how do they develop? Most of these issues usually start in someone’s childhood. They’re rooted in the ways children bond with their adults in their early lives. For example, you might have experienced a parent who was there for you some days, but distant or distracted on others. As a result, you grew up uncertain about whether or not you could trust others. If you didn’t have a consistent, secure emotional foundation, you might struggle with forming similar bonds with your children. This inconsistency sometimes leads to approval seeking and a constant cry for reassurance (called anxious attachment). Alternatively, you could withdraw from emotional closeness (called avoidant attachment). There are also cases [...]

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Signs of OCD in Children: What to Look For

Signs of OCD in Children: What to Look For

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-05-30T08:48:14+00:00May 30th, 2025|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, OCD|

You may be familiar with the phrase “dinner-bath-bed” as it applies to small toddlers. This is a type of ritual that helps to give the young child an expectation of what is going to happen next and helps to form his or her view of the world. This article will explain how these rituals are linked to signs of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) in children. As a child matures, so do the types of rituals that apply. At school, children create group rituals when learning to play games in the playground, singing songs, or taking part in sports. Teenagers may start collecting items as a hobby. These rituals play an important part in helping children socialize and learn to cope with anxiety. Noticing Signs of OCD This is where obsessive-compulsive disorders (OCD) come in. OCD is a type of anxiety disorder that is linked to obsessions via recurring thoughts, and compulsions via recurring behaviors. Studies show that unwanted obsessive thoughts in children are often a sign of OCD. These thoughts are linked to fears, such as becoming dirty by touching an object. He or she will use compulsive rituals like too-frequent handwashing as a way to control fear. Confronted with the challenge of obsessive thoughts, a child with OCD will display increasingly more signs of OCD through recurrent and compelling rituals that may even get in the way of everyday life and development. What are the reasons for the signs of OCD? Studies have presented inconclusive results on the cause of OCD. However, experts think that this disorder is caused in our brains due to a lack of the chemical serotonin. As with other disorders, if your parents and siblings have OCD, there is a higher chance that you may have it too. This leads some experts to conclude that its [...]

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Signs of Burnout at Work

Signs of Burnout at Work

Melissa Plantz2025-05-22T07:27:32+00:00May 22nd, 2025|Depression, Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

There once was a time when the weekend was glorious. You took care of household chores, spent time with family, read a novel or watched a movie, and worshipped God with your much-loved church family. But then, Sunday night, you felt it creeping over you. That dreaded feeling that overtakes you every Sunday night. You have hit burnout at work. As time wears on, you notice those feelings now consume your evenings and your weekends. You feel on edge, irritable, depressed, and physically ill at the thought of going back to work. Yet, you have no choice. You have bills to pay and adult responsibilities. Is something happening with you, or are these signs of burnout at work? The Signs of Burnout at Work Are you displaying the signs of burnout at work? Have coworkers commented on your mood or attitude? Do you notice your patience seems thin around customers or clients? If so, you might be in burnout mode. The following is a list of common signs of burnout at work. You feel dread the evening before work You feel like you do not fit in with the culture or the people at work You struggle to get to work and clock in Your supervisor makes comments about your lack of motivation You cannot concentrate on tasks You lose patience with coworkers, supervisors, and customers You feel exhausted Your sleep routine has changed Your appetite has changed You experience headaches, stomachaches, and other unexplainable physical ailments You snap at loved ones You feel depressed or anxious You do not feel like you contribute anything to your job Your position no longer fulfills you Job burnout can affect all areas of your life, including your physical and mental health. If your job is misaligned with your values, you will feel [...]

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Types of Behavioral Therapy for Children

Types of Behavioral Therapy for Children

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-05-09T06:54:02+00:00May 9th, 2025|Christian Counseling for Children, Family Counseling, Featured|

Behavioral therapy for children is a treatment that focuses on a child’s actions rather than on their emotions. It is based on the premise that behaviors are learned, and so they can also be changed. Techniques may vary according to the disorder being treated, but the primary emphasis is on promoting desirable behaviors while reducing or eliminating unwanted ones. Primary caregivers and teachers are usually involved in the process as well. Generally, the earlier the intervention, the more successful the outcome will be. Untreated children with behavioral disorders are likely to grow up to be dysfunctional adults. Signs Your Child May Need Behavioral Therapy Regular irritability Defiant behaviors Loss of interest in activities they enjoyed Intense emotional reactions Easily set off by minor triggers Temper tantrums Difficulty handling frustration Sudden change in mood or behavior Failure to act their age Head banging, hair pulling, or skin picking Repeated biting, hitting, or kicking Constant fighting Disrespect for authority figures Lying Frequent nightmares Anxiety that interferes with normal activities Stealing Significant changes in sleeping and eating habits Excessive worrying or sadness Types Of Behavioral Therapy for Children Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) Cognitive behavioral therapy is a combination of behavioral therapy, which focuses on patterns of action, and cognitive therapy, which focuses on thought patterns. Studies have shown it to be an effective form of treatment for many psychological disorders among children and adolescents such as depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), oppositional defiant disorder (ODD), and disruptive behavior. The counselor will help your child become aware of his or her thoughts and feelings, evaluate if they are rational or distorted, and learn how to replace them with more positive ones. By discovering new ways of looking at things, the child learns how to respond differently. Techniques [...]

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Overcoming Resentment in Family Relationships

Overcoming Resentment in Family Relationships

Ronald Jenkins, Kate Motaung2025-04-29T07:03:15+00:00April 29th, 2025|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Every family story does not read with the fairy tale ending of “they all lived happily ever after.” We can look at the Bible and see many relationships fractured by favoritism, strife, envy, and deception among those in the same bloodline. Though many millennia later, we see evidence of the same painful and traumatic experiences in the Bible populate our own timelines and family stories. Over time, living with these conditions can wear on a person’s soul and fray hope for something better or at least different. Unresolved pain, anger, and unforgiveness deposit themselves into the soil of our lives, turning the roots of our family tree bitter and bearing the fruit of resentment. Overcoming resentment is no easy feat. We cannot ignore infractions, errors, and missteps and expect to just get over what has happened that is part of our difficult family past or present. God does not expect us to place ourselves in a position where we remain objects of someone else’s evil intentions or actions. It grieves Him to see us endure forms of abuse, neglect, or harm, whether we are experiencing it for the first time or constantly reliving it through triggers or the hold that unforgiveness may have on our souls. Part of embracing His wisdom, love, and care is tending to our safety and our souls to heal from what would have otherwise destroyed us. Resentment in the Bible In Genesis, we gather a tale of two brothers. Cain resented Abel for his offering, though God commended the younger of Adam and Eve’s first two sons (Hebrews 11:4). God, in wisdom and love, counseled Cain, advising that his offering would be accepted if he would address the sin that crouched at his door. God knew that envy was waiting to devour Cain, but [...]

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The Hyperactive Child: Symptoms of ADHD in Children

The Hyperactive Child: Symptoms of ADHD in Children

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-03-13T08:47:18+00:00March 13th, 2025|ADHD/ADD, Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

Children are commonly known as little balls of energy. It’s a normal part of growing up. However, some children appear to have an overabundance of energy that prohibits them from being able to sit for long periods of time or to focus on schoolwork and other tasks. How can you tell if your hyperactive child is truly hyperactive, or simply in a normal phase of childhood? According to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), more than six million children in the United States have been diagnosed with ADHD, as of a survey dated 2016. What exactly is ADHD? ADHD stands for Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Although it is commonly seen in children, adults can also show signs of ADHD. A child with ADHD may have difficulty focusing on schoolwork, constantly “fidget,” and/or have uncontrollable impulses. An individual may suffer chronic bouts of the disorder throughout their life. ADHD may stem from a variety of root causes such as dysfunctional relationships, low self-esteem, or victimization at school or at home. Genetics can also play a role in whether a child develops the disorder. If one or more parent has the condition, their offspring may exhibit some of the symptoms of ADHD as children. Brain structure and brain function may contribute to the change in behavior. Researchers are still unclear on what the underlying causes for the disorder might be when it comes to the brain but theorize it is possibly due to chemical imbalances or problems with the neurotransmitters. Unfortunately, parents may feel at fault if their child is diagnosed with ADHD as the public at large points to an undisciplined child out of control. However, there is a myriad of causes, including the physical and emotional ones listed above. Pesticides, food dyes, in utero exposure to alcohol or [...]

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Healthy Parenting Tips to Help You Raise Your Kid Well

Healthy Parenting Tips to Help You Raise Your Kid Well

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2025-01-25T04:02:17+00:00January 27th, 2025|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Having kids can be a beautiful challenge to take on. To be honest, it can be overwhelming, too. Being able to turn to others for wisdom can indeed be helpful, but you need to make sure that whatever wisdom you receive makes sense, really works, and fits in with who you are and what you desire for your children. Sometimes you can try things out, but if they aren’t working out, it’s okay to take a step back and try something new. Below are a few healthy parenting tips that you can try out to help you raise your kids well. You may be facing various or specific challenges with your kids, and that can affect the kind of help you need. Sometimes, making simple tweaks to what you’re already doing will do the trick; at other times, you’ll need a whole new approach. At other times, it may be prudent to seek professional help. Parenting Tips to Help You on the Way You know your kids better than anyone else, and one helpful pointer as you think about your parenting is to learn to trust your instincts more. Of course, our instincts need to get sharpened, and it always helps to be informed, but trust that the Lord gave you those kids for a reason. Yes, you’ll make mistakes as a parent, but you can learn from them and grow in your ability to parent well. Here are some healthy parenting tips you can implement to raise your kids well: Leading by example Parents sometimes fall into the trap of wanting their kids to do what they say, and not to imitate what they do. The reality is that kids learn by imitation, and so they will often pattern themselves after you and what they see you do. [...]

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Adventures in Parenting: Addressing Resentment, Burnout, and the Shame of Parenting Fatigue

Adventures in Parenting: Addressing Resentment, Burnout, and the Shame of Parenting Fatigue

Stacy Davis, Kate Motaung2024-11-13T10:46:27+00:00August 16th, 2024|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Parenting is one job where we are constantly “on.” Being a mom or dad can feel like a thankless endeavor. Unlike paid employment, it doesn’t build in its own breaks or allow us to renegotiate our compensation. While there are many sweet and tender moments, child rearing is sometimes saturated with the mundane. In some seasons, the hum of laundry, dishes, and the rhythms of running a household drone on while our own resolve fades in weariness and parenting fatigue. In other times, the whirlwind of parent and kid activity escalates as we juggle chores, homework, careers, and the stressors associated with raising a family in a turbulent world. We can become inundated with pressure to get ahead of the frenetic pace, then ashamed that we feel resentful of the families we love. Some days we may be uncertain if tantrums, whether our own or that of our kids, are steamrolling us over the edge of grace. As God-appointed leaders in our homes, we must be intentional to build respite into our rhythms to preserve our peace and well-being. Otherwise, we combust and burn out, bringing catastrophe to our families and ourselves. Parenting fatigue is real. Sometimes, the seasons we face squeeze the essence of every spiritual fruit, testing patience and stretching faith beyond what we feel is our capacity. The strain of life and the chaos of bursting schedules wear us out, dulling the edge of our effectiveness. When mental states fray and emotions escalate, it is difficult for us to be present with ourselves, let alone fully available to the children we love. In defiance, stress levels shriek, releasing a cry for help that shows up in us and our kids through potentially destructive behaviors, if left unchecked. While God created us to have full lives and [...]

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Teaching Your Child How to Control Anger Well

Teaching Your Child How to Control Anger Well

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T17:19:47+00:00March 18th, 2024|Anger Issues, Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

When a child is born, they have a lot of things to figure out about themselves and the world around them. Everything, from moving about to eating, to playing, to communicating with others must all be learned. Another important part of what a child needs to learn is how to experience and express their emotions well, especially learning to control anger. Being able to regulate and express one’s emotions well has a positive impact on relationships and personal well-being. One of the key tasks of a parent or caregiver is to help a child understand their own emotions and to know what the most appropriate ways of expressing those emotions are. Much of this happens in the early, formative years of the child, though we are always growing and learning how to do better. Reasons children get angry When the words “temper tantrum” are uttered, more likely than not, the image that pops into our heads is a flailing, screaming child in the grocery store or park. Parents often wonder if their child’s behavior is normal, and they can find themselves thinking long and hard about what they can do to help their child. Younger children, below the age of four, can have multiple tantrums in a week. These can include kicking, crying, stomping, and pushing. As a child grows older, they ought to outgrow this behavior. There are many reasons a child gets angry, including the following: Family dysfunction and parenting styles A harsh parenting style that does not consider the child’s needs and personality, or parenting that is inconsistent can lead to a child exhibiting anger and aggression. Genetics This and other biological factors can play a role in a child displaying anger and aggression. Frustration Like any adult, children can get angry when their expectations and [...]

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Dealing with Anxiety in Adolescence

Dealing with Anxiety in Adolescence

Sandra Stein2024-09-27T10:35:17+00:00January 23rd, 2024|Anxiety, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

Adolescence is a vulnerable period between childhood and adulthood marked by a rapidly changing body and fluctuating hormones. Anxiety is a natural response as teenagers try to adjust to these changes, figure out their identity, become more independent, try new things and deal with a major life transition. It is a deluge of newness. They may not yet be fully equipped to handle these added responsibilities and pressures as their brain is still developing and will not reach full physiological maturation until they are in their twenties. Anxiety in adolescence becomes cause for concern when it is excessive and irrational, and interferes with your teen’s school performance, sleep, social interactions, and ability to go about daily life. Things that cause anxiety in adolescence. There are countless things that contribute to anxiety in adolescence. From parental expectation to conform to their parents’ value system or pressure to succeed, to the demands they, their teachers, and society may put on them to meet societal norms, worry can spin out of control. As they attempt to juggle school, friends, and activities, they become overwhelmed. Much like newborns and babies, adolescents require more sleep than people in other stages of life. With all the activities, commitments, and young adult responsibilities, sleep deprivation significantly impacts a young person’s ability to cope with all that is going on in their lives, particularly when they overextend themselves, trying to do too much. Likewise, shame haunts and drives anxiety. Whether an adolescent fails in a competitive environment or just fears it, they can feel overwhelmed with life. How they are perceived by others, what they believe others think of them, peer pressure, concerns of body image, inadequate feelings driven by social media, all drive anxiety and fear about being humiliated and embarrassed. Physical and hormonal changes fuel [...]

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