How to Stem Codependency in Friendships
In his book The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis wrote, “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” Our lives are made richer by our friendships, and they are sources of growth, joy, and mutual respect. These "unnecessary" relationships provide us with the support we need, making life a more beautiful venture. While recognizing the value of friendships and how they nurture us, it’s also important to understand that things can and do go wrong in friendships. Boundaries can become blurred in those relationships, and emotional reliance on one another can become excessive. This has the potential to lead a relationship into codependency, which can strain and damage the relationship in the short and long term. Understanding Codependency in Friendships Friends rely on each other for a lot of things, including emotional support, encouragement, wisdom when making challenging decisions, and just enjoying life together. Through the many ups and downs that life presents, your friends are the people who go with you on that journey. This is how friendship works Mutual dependence between friends is one thing, but codependency goes over the line in a few significant ways. So, what does codependency between friends look like? Codependency is an unhealthy emotional reliance on another person. This can look like one or both friends feeling like they are ultimately responsible for the other’s decisions, happiness, or sense of self-worth. No one can be responsible for another in the way a codependent relationship function. What happens in a codependent relationship is that the boundaries are blurred, and the two people become enmeshed in each other. They aren’t operating out of their sense of identity and individuality; instead, who they are becomes too closely tied to each other. They become too reliant on each other, being unable to function [...]








